Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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