Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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