Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
