White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
