Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Say something about gay babies.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
