I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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