my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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