Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
you never un-have a 4some
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
