Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
