Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
