: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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