Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
So much rum. So many feels.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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