Your dad touched me again.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
