hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
