can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I need to align my fucking chakras
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
