i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
