My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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