I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I need to calm my uterus...
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
