wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I need to sanitize my soul.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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