chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
