i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
