We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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