dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
