so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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