I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
