I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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