Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
and she was petting her beer can
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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