tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
