i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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