I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
