Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
barbara walters just said penis...
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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