before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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