I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
