i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
