I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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