The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
