one might say we're banned from that church
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
