ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
