gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize