so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He shit in the fireplace
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
