The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize