Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
