So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize