I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
