Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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