Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
