i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
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