we're blogging at a bar
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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