grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
