You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
